The story of the bracelet.

Back in the early 90s, when Casey and I were in junior high, it was a thing to have one of those Things Remembered ID bracelets.   I really wanted one.  I wanted a small, delicate gold bracelet that had my name scrawled in the most elegant script that was available at the small keosk in the center of the mall.  More importantly, I didn't want to buy it myself.  I wanted to be gifted it by a boyfriend.  

I saw the other girls wearing them.  I would hear them talking about how their boyfriends were so awesome.  They talked about how they were going to go and have professional pictures taken at JC Penney's or Sears.  Bracelets AND pictures?!  These relationships were SOLID!  My 12 year old self was jealous.  My 12 year old self was also ackward AF.  

Sure, the braces were starting to do their job and pull my teeth together, but the quickly growing-out perm, 80s glasses and weird fashion sense (I had a love for jumpsuits, neon colors, dangly earrings and vests.) didn't make me the most appealing of 12 year olds.  Fairly sure neither boy nor girl would touch me at that point.  

Not so long ago, Casey and I were reminiscing about our younger years.  We have been noticing that a lot of stuff from the 90s is creeping back up.  Baggy jeans, denim jackets, crop tops, blue eyeshadow.  They're all popping back up but in a new and different way.  

As the discussion came around to relationships and junior high.  I told Casey about the "power couple" at our school.  I still remember their names - Monique and Brian.  Brian was one of the class clowns.  Monique, I thought was glamourous with her french sounding name.  She wore Guess jeans and keds, her hair perfectly curled.  Me? I wore whatever was on sale that my mom brought home and burned my forehead with the curling iron.   

I thought they were so grown up.  They held hands in the hallways, they close danced at all the dances, and I even saw them kissing outside after school one day.  Kissing?! In 7th/8th grade?!  People did that?!?!  

I remember when Monique came to school with the bracelet.  She was showing it off to everyone.  She was so proud that Brian had gotten her that bracelet.  I think it may have been around Valentine's Day.   I remember thinking that they were going to have the most awesome Valentine's Day ever.  

As I told Casey the story, she laughed.  In the back of my mind, though, I was thinking about how I was going to find her one of those bracelets and give it to her for Christmas.  The words that went through my head were "If I had known you back then, I would have gotten one for you."  

I ordered the bracelet and it came in just in time for Christmas.  I wanted to write this whole big romantic letter, explaining the significance of the bracelet.  It was important to me that Casey understand that I have been wanting to do something like this for someone my whole life.  

I have given Casey jewelry before.  Casey has worn bracelets before.  But for some reason, this was important.  For me, it was a way to tie Casey's past and my past together.  I wanted Casey to know that even though we didn't know each other back then, that if I had known her back then, I would have gotten a bracelet for her.  

The bracelet was important.  The letter was supposed to explain everything.  I sat down to write so many times.  I would start, delete, give up.  I just couldn't find the right words.  I still can't find the right words.  

I ended up just giving the package to Casey.  As I did, I shrugged and said "I would have given this to you earlier if I could have."   I think Casey thought that I meant that I would have given it to her before Christmas.  What I actually meant was that if I had met her earlier, I would have given it to her then.  

This was my way of tying our lives together before we actually were tied together.  It was my way of changing the past and making her a part of it.  

She hasn't taken off the bracelet since she got it.